Conversation between Dusty, a mutt, and Lizzie, a visiting Australian cattle dog:
“It’s time.”
“Time?”
“Time.”
“Time for what?”
“To go to the Go Out door.”
“The Go Out door?”
“The Go Out door.”
“Why?”
“To go out.”
“To go out?”
“Yes, to go out.”
“I don’t have to go out.”
“I have to go out.”
“…”
“So I am going to the Go Out door.”
“I’m coming.”
“Where?”
“To the go out door.”
“You have to go out?”
“No.”
“…”
“…”
“This is the Go Out door.”
“How do you know?”
“Because this is where I go out.”
“But you can’t go out.”
“Why not?”
“There is no place to go out.”
“That is because the door is closed.”
“Open it.”
“I can’t open it.”
“Why can’t you open it?”
“Because only the Food People can open it.”
“The Food People? It’s time for food?”
“No, it’s time to go out.
“…”
“So I am at the Go Out door.”
“Waiting for the Go Out people.”
“No, waiting for the Food People.”
“Not the Go Out people?”
“The Food People are the Go Out People.”
“What if the Food People do not come?”
“Then I push my nose against the Go Out Door.”
“That opens the Go Out Door?”
“No.”
“…”
“It brings the Food People.”
“How?”
“…”
“…”
“I don’t know.”
“Push the door with your nose.”
“I am pushing the door with my nose.”
“The Food People!”
“The Food People.”
“The Food People are here.”
“Because I pushed my nose on the Go Out door.”
“Your nose is magic.”
“Yes, my nose is magic.”
“Yes.”
“But not always.”
“Not always?”
“Sometimes the Food People do not come when I push my Magic Nose on the Go Out door.”
“They don’t come?”
“No. And the Go Out Door does not open.”
“…”
“Yes. The Go Out Door does … not … open.”
“Oh.”
“But I still have to go out.”
“What do you do?”
“If the Go Out Door doesn’t open?”
“Yes.”
“I go to …”
“Yes?”
“The
“The
“The
“What is the
“It is much smaller than the
“How much smaller?”
“Very much smaller. But the ground …”
“Yes?”
“Is much softer. And smells different.”
“Where is the
“I don’t remember.”
“You don’t remember?”
“No. But it is close.”
“How do you know?”
“I can always find it with my nose.”
“Your Magic Nose!”
“Yes. My Magic Nose tells me where it is. Only …”
“What?”
“The Food People, well-“
“What?”
“After I use the
“Why?”
“I don’t know.”
“They bark?”
“Loudly. So loud I put my ears down.”
“…”
“Then another thing happens.”
“What?”
“The poop disappears.”
“What?”
“The poop in the
“It’s gone?”
“Yes. Not like the poop in the
“…”
“You must be careful in the
“Yes.”
“And go only in the place you smell yourself in the
“Of course.”
“Yes.”
“I have to go out.”
“You do?”
“Yes.”
“But you said you didn’t.”
“Now I do.”
“You do?”
“I do.”
“The Food People are getting closer.”
“Yes.”
“Wag your tail.”
“OK.”
“Faster!”
“Why?”
“It pleases the Food People, and they are the ones who open the Go Out Door.”
“The Go Out Door is opening.”
“Yes. We are going out.”
“We are out!”
“We are out.”
“Only …”
“Yes?”
“How do we get back in?”
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